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51.8%ANMag Issue 22 Personal Maintenance
Society Part III: Of Them Together
By Mohamad Sobh, Staff Writer
Jeddah, Saudi Arabia − We have probed several characteristics of the opposite genders in past articles, and I found it appropriate that I merge the two together as one − because they cannot live in isolation of each other. I found myself very apprehensive at first because I had laid down several frameworks in the prevailing articles which I thought might constrain this particular excursion. In other words, I had backed myself against the wall. Nevertheless, and as usual, the words manifested on their own, and luckily for me, the words touched upon issues I think are of the most relevance.
This will not be another short story on how stinky men are, or on how women are lacking in perspective. I will make it short and sweet, with hope, no matter how futile, that there will come a time when harmony between the genders is the norm, and not the anomaly.
I make it a vital part of what I do to listen to feedback on my articles, where we can think of my article as a product, and the feedback as primary market research. I was pleased to see that the feedback was what I had expected, for there were mixed reviews, with those who militantly defended their gender and christened the articles as blabber of a madman, those who agreed on some points and disagreed (politely) on others, and then there were those who wanted to get me off their backs and said they loved every word of the article!
As I said, this feedback was all expected, for not one of your fingers is the same, but it is really not the politics that I am concerned with, but rather, the undercurrent of it all, the foundation.
Men and women constitute the fabric of society, and it would not fare well if they were to start repelling each other like the opposing sides of a magnet. Thus, although there is extrinsic disagreement, intrinsically there is consensus on the issues of vital importance. I will not delve into the complex dynamics of human interaction, for I do not claim to understand them all, nor am I trying to. Thus, what I call for is healthy communication, and branching off from that are tolerance and mutual understanding, for although love should logically be the cornerstone of any relationship, we would not have ourselves a building with only a cornerstone; there is electricity, water, telephone lines, cement, steel, and most recently DSL. I am not saying that we have to accept people with all their faults, but what we need to do is constantly develop our personalities and not remain in the static. It is somewhat similar to a financial theory concerning diversification of risk: we can always eliminate firm-specific risk through efficiency, proper practices, strong supply chain, and so on and so forth, but we can never eliminate market risk, where the control is not in our hands, much like the Great Depression. Again I digress; what I mean to say is that you can be on the same page as your partner is, but the external environment may have a hand in the partner’s relapse. Lord please deliver us from temptation! Where did that last one come from?! Must be all the television I have been watching lately.
What I call for is to make use of the mind, and to have faith in oneself, for the change must always come from within. And as the saying goes, when you set your mind on something, all the forces in the universe will conspire to help you achieve your goal. That is nonsense, of course! The substance lies in the strength of will, and the determination to make a relationship work, it is only then that the “market risk” will be eradicated, and my hope in humanity will be restored. I do not see the cup as half empty, nor do I see it as half full; we are on middle ground, undecided as to whether to take one step forward or a couple of steps backwards. Thus, I urge you all − and this call is genderless − to think first and then act later, proceed on perspective rather than impulse, and it is only then that we will reach our haven.