Exhibit or Inhibit?
By Suha Karaky, Managing Editor

Beirut, Lebanon – “Do the meanings of the heart swim in the streams of our conversations, and do they matter most when they’re glimpsed through deep water and never caught?”

As I read this thought-provoking idea in Richard Bach’s Running from Safety: An Adventure of the Spirit, I could not help but wonder… Express or repress?

In our society, the majority is brought up by parents who rarely put their emotions out in the open. Expression is usually, although not necessarily, never unleashed; rather, caregivers tend to resort to other means to show the “apples of their eyes” that they are loved and cherished. Some might consider gifts; others written notes… Bottom line is: hello, covert sentimental communication!

Communication... That five-syllable word that can shake a family or break it! Why jeopardize the future – and psyche – of our cute little ones by not instilling this skill of communiqué in them? Children often imitate adults, whether in behavior, words or actions. With that in mind, why are we surprised when many of those kids, in turn, grow up to become mature, successful individuals who are flawless and worthy of pride – yet hard-to-read?

Why does understanding how others feel about us require reading their minds, if not deciphering the codes that are pitched into the air around them?

One of my friends has been going through a hard time pinpointing his girlfriend’s feelings – and thoughts! He constantly tries to smash the icy shield she has built around herself. Melting it with his warmth was a failure. Crashing it with strong emotions was a frustration. With that life-crashing reality, he decided to just let her be, hoping time will take its toll on the shield and hopefully break – and not only bend – it.

That reality is more widespread than anyone can imagine: people living in their own cocoons, others in isolation – or simply, in repression!

Relationships are all about the exact opposite of repression – expression. Come to think of it, each is basically a relation between two ships that were probably just wandering in the sea and happened to start heading towards the same destination, in parallel and independent – yet intertwined – tracks. Captains of those ships have to share, rather than conceal, their skills and strategies in order to reach that aspired goal. Therefore, containment would be a killer, manifestation a savior.

Save your relationships. Tell your loved ones you care. If something bothers you, refrain from just burying it inside till the bottle of emotions suddenly breaks – glass pieces splattering around and possibly causing injury.

Feelings are like moisturizers, making it easier to live and survive the hardships of this world. Make use of these blessings, and open up that bottle. However, leash some of what is inside that sentimental vase, for sometimes, “deep water” holds the most precious treasures…

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